Twist That Tongue!

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:13 am

I would if I could, and if I couldn't, how could I?
You couldn't, unless you could, could you?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:14 am

If Bob Dole could dole dough?
Bob Dole would dole as much dough as Bob Dole could dole,
if Bob Dole could dole dough.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:14 am

If coloured caterpillars could change their colours constantly
could they keep their coloured coat coloured properly?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:14 am

If he slipped, should she slip?
If I assist a sister-assistant,
will the sister's sister-assistant assist me?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:16 am

If I put it in my batter, it will make my batter bitter!
So she bought a bit of butter better than her bitter butter,
And she put it in her batter, and her batter was not bitter.
So 'twas better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:16 am

If Kantie can tie a tie and untie a tie,
why can't I tie a tie and untie a tie like Kantie can.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:16 am

If Pickford's packers packed a packet of crisps
would the packet of crisps that Pickford's packers packed
survive for two and a half years?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:25 am

If Stu chews shoes, should Stu choose the shoes he chews?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:26 am

If two witches would watch two watches,
which witch would watch which watch?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:26 am

If you can't can any candy can,
how many candy cans can a candy canner can
if he can can candy cans?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:27 am

If you go for a gopher a gopher will go for a gopher hole.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:28 am

If you must cross a course cross cow across a crowded cow crossing,
cross the cross coarse cow across the crowded cow crossing carefully.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:28 am

If you notice this notice, you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:29 am

If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker,
it is slick to put a lock upon your stock.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:30 am

For some joker who is quicker will rob you of your liquor
if you fail to lock your liquor with a lock.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:31 am

If you understand, say "understand".
If you don't understand,
say "don't understand".
But if you understand and say
"don't understand".
How do I understand that you understand.
Understand!?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:32 am

If you're keen on stunning kites and cunning stunts,
buy a cunning stunning stunt kite.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:33 am

Ike ships ice chips in ice chips ships.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:33 am

I'll chew and chew until my jaws drop.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:34 am

I'm a sheet slitter. I slit sheets.
I am the best sheet slitter that ever slit a sheet.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:34 am

I'm a sock cutter and I cut socks

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:38 am

I'm not a fig plucker nor a fig plucker's son,
but I'll pluck your fig's 'til the fig plucker comes.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:39 am

I'm not the pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's mate,
And I'm only plucking pheasants 'cause the pheasant plucker's late.
I'm not the pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's son,
And I'm only plucking pheasants till the pheasant pluckers come.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:39 am

Imagine an imaginary menagerie
manager managing an imaginary menagerie.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:40 am

In Hertford, Hereford and Hampshire hurricanes hardly ever happen.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:40 am

Inchworms itching.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:41 am

Is a pleasant peasant's pheasant present?
Is there a pleasant peasant present?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:41 am

Is this your sister's sixth zither, sir?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:42 am

It's not the cough that carries you off,
it's the coffin they carry you off in!

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:44 am

Jack the jailbird jacked a jeep.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:45 am

John, where Molly had had "had", had had "had had".
"Had, had" had had the teachers approval Judicial system.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:45 am

June sheep sleep soundly.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:45 am

Just think, that sphinx has a sphincter that stinks!

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:46 am

Kanta is a masai girl, she can tie a tie and untie a tie,
if kanta can tie a tie and untie a tie, why can't I tie a tie and untie an tie?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:47 am

Keenly cleaning copper kettles.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:47 am

Ken Dodd's dad's dog 's dead.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:47 am

King Thistle stuck a thousand thistles in the thistle of his thumb.
A thousand thistles King Thistle stuck in the thistle of his thumb.
If King Thistle stuck a thousand thistles in the thistle of his thumb, How many thistles did King Thistle stick in the thistle of his thumb?

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:48 am

Kiss her quick, kiss her quicker, kiss her quickest!

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:48 am

Knapsack straps.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:49 am

Kris Kringle carefully crunched on candy canes.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:51 am

Larry Hurley, a burly squirrel hurler,
hurled a furry squirrel through a curly grill.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:51 am

Larry sent the latter a letter later.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:51 am

Lesser weather never weathered lesser wetter weather.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:52 am

Lily ladles little Letty's lentil soup.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:52 am

Lisa laughed listlessly.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:53 am

Listen to the local yokel yodel.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:53 am

Literally literary.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:53 am

Little Mike left his bike like Tike at Spike's.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:54 am

Lonely lowland llamas are ladylike.

Subject: Re: Twist That Tongue! 12th October 2007, 7:54 am

Lovely lemon liniment.

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